Why Am I Not Interested in Sex?
There is a frightening trend that occurs in many marriages and serious relationships today – frigidity. I know you have heard all the clichés. Especially about couples who don’t have sex after marriage. But really … what they have to say is that sex may reduce after having children and consume with the pressure of raising them, feeding them, and educating them!
I mean who really has the energy or courage to look sexy, feel sexy, and better have sex! Children have a lot of work. Hey, life is a lot of work. Is this why our mother was very angry when we were kids?
Well, if you want to live in reality – in the end, you have to discuss this problem in your marriage. Married people have sex, and just enjoy it, and hopefully want it at least semi-regularly. We need it.
So why do so many of us not handle frigidity problems such as finance, careers, our children? Why do we avoid it? Yes, because even in modern society today, sex is still a very uncomfortable subject for us to discuss with our children, our friends, and our partners.
Isn’t that strange? We like good romance novels or romantic comedies. So why don’t we talk? Yes, in many cases we feel that we are the source of the problem, but we may confuse or afraid to admit it and handle it.
If this sounds like you and your marriage, there may be some concrete ways you can discuss what should be a very difficult and painful topic for you and your partner. Let’s go back to intimacy.
First – if you have a cold desire to make love, go to the doctor and check for yourself. Fluctuating hormone levels. Having children can make you run out of money. Make sure it’s not a physical problem.
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Also, there are some women who always experience frigidity or even painful sex during sexual intercourse but never overcome it. Maybe you think that a certain position is not for you, but maybe you have a physical problem that has a solution. Simply put – if you cannot arouse or uncomfortable, even after a round of foreplay, something might happen physically. Check with your obstetrician.
Second – If you check fine, and physically there is nothing wrong with your partner, then you can assume that the problem might be something mental/emotional.
Are you tire? Tired mentally? Bored with him? Is he still attractive to you or just a warm body? Do you feel unattractive? Do you think he feels you are not attractive? Have any of you ever cheated – and know about it? Is sex boring – routine habits?
It is a big myth that sex is not an important part of a relationship. Physical intimacy with your partner is very important for the health of your relationship.
If you date, you MUST be sexually attracted to that person. Otherwise, you may face serious problems in the future.
Likewise, if you are married, sex may not feel like it first happens to him, but it must satisfying and desirable for both of you. Frigidity-low feelings of sexual desire?
1. Determine the source of your stress. Write it down. Give a number to them. Get a list. What stresses you the most? Finance? Intimacy? Children? Disease? Family?
2. Now sort by order of importance. The last item on the list that you have to get rid of this week. For example, if your children stress you out. Hire caregivers; go on a date with your partner, and at the end of the night try to start intimacy.
3. Continue to work to reduce your list when you follow your date night etc.
4. Find things to reduce your overall cold level. Activities like reading books, yoga, walking / running, old hobbies, dancing with your favorite music on iPod, etc.
Reducing your overall stress is a great way to increase relaxation during times of intimacy. Sometimes we put great performance pressure on ourselves and accidentally sabotage our performance. Plus happy people have more sex! Well, I’m not sure about that statistically but it makes sense doesn’t it?
Frigidity: Sexual Health Problems that Grow among Women
Having female sexual dysfunction can be troublesome, a terrible condition similar to erectile dysfunction in men. Insufficient sexual performance in women can be a difficult problem that can have many several causes.
An estimated 40% of women suffer from fridigity, and may be caused by any physical illness, or may be related to psychological factors. This condition mainly affects women’s sexual health and has symptoms including lack of sexual desire, inability to enjoy sex, inadequate vaginal lubrication, and even failure to experience orgasm.
This is basically known as Female Sexual Arousal Disorder (FSAD), this situation still makes women expressively desire sex, but their genital area fails to react normally, making it painful or difficult to have sex. When men and women are usually aroused, their genitals become full of blood.
For women, these results in swelling of the clitoris and nearby tissue (similar to male erection), emission of vaginal lubrication, and lessening and widening of the vaginal opening for sexual intercourse.
A woman’s sexual health is exaggerated by several other health issues. In this case, frigidity can result from underlying medical conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes. It causes by certain irritations, infections, and growth in the vaginal area. This can also be a negative physiological reaction to certain birth control methods.
Cold conditions can also be caused by drugs used to treat high blood pressure, stomach ulcers, depression, anxiety, or cancer. Other reasons for frigidity may be a combination of physical, hormonal or emotional changes that occur during or after pregnancy, or while breastfeeding.
In addition, frigidity can also associate with several psychological causes including depression, poor self-esteem, sexual abuse, fear of pregnancy, inadequate or ineffective warming, feelings of shame or guilt about sex, or stress and fatigue.
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For the treatment of cold conditions, ongoing research has suggested that the use of Viagra to treat sexual disorders in women helps increase blood flow, thereby increasing physical stimulation in the genital area. However, researchers are still waiting for evidence that Viagra can really work in women. For now, doctors concentrate on eliminating drugs that might have a negative impact on women’s sexual health. Doctors also review the effects of certain contraceptive methods that can be a factor that allows frigidity.
For women who suffer from vaginal dryness, it recommends that they use lubricants before sexual intercourse to prevent pain. On the other hand, some doctors recommend women to practice Kegel Exercises, a form of exercise that helps in developing the muscles around the outside of the vagina.
These muscles are involved in the production of pleasant sensations. In addition, psychological counseling can also play an integral role in caring for women with sexual problems, including frigidity. Training in sexual foreplay and stimulation techniques can also contribute to the health of a woman suffering from frigidity.
After knowing all this, women can now become more aware of these sexual health conditions that may be experienced by many people but often misunderstood. Consulting a person’s doctor may be the best way to find out more about frigidity. A constant examination session with your doctor or obstetrician will also help women prevent or overcome frustrating sexual conditions.
Bring Back the Lost Sexual Drive
When a woman loses her desire to have sex, it’s not only in her head. The lack of sexual arousal is the major sexual health issue among women irrespective of age. A recent study showed that about one-third of women aged 18 to 59 suffer from frigidity, also known as Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD).
Many factors responsible for lack of sexual desire and encouragement for women including:
Interpersonal relationship problems including partner performance problems, lack of emotional satisfaction in relationships, childbirth, and being a caregiver for loved ones who are sick can cause frigidity.
Socio-cultural or career factors including work stress, peer pressure and media image about sexuality can negatively affect sexual desire.
Low testosterone also produces frigidity in men and women. Testosterone levels peak in women in their mid-20s and then continue to decline until menopause when that level drops dramatically.
Medical issues or mental sicknesses such as gloominess, or medical states, such as endometriosis, fibroids and thyroid disorders, have an impact on a woman’s sexual drive both mentally and physically.
Drugs such as antidepressants (including a new generation of serotonin reuptake inhibitors or SSRIs), blood pressure-lowering drugs, and oral contraceptives can cause frigidity by lowering testosterone levels or affecting blood flow.
Age is also a factor because androgens fall continuously in women as they age.
Because frigidity is caused by a combination of physical and psychological factors, more than one treatment approach is needed to overcome the problem. As soon as the factors that cause frigidity have been determined, potential treatment options can include:
Sex therapy and/or relationship counseling. Sexual health problems usually affect both parties in a relationship; it should discuss together or individually with a mental health professional.
Change medication or change dosage. Frigidity caused by drugs can be overcome by changing prescriptions. Using alternative therapies can also recommend. If oral contraception is suspected as the cause of a decrease in testosterone levels, different formulations or non-hormonal contraceptive methods can be determined.
Overcome the underlying medical condition. Medical problems that contribute to frigidity may require surgical treatment, such as removal of fibroids or pain medications.
Use of vaginal estrogen. In postmenopausal women, vaginal estrogen cream may use to treat vaginal dryness.
Testosterone therapy. Although there are no hormones or drugs that approve by the FDA to treat frigidity in women, many obstetricians recommend using testosterone therapy for women with low sexual desire to return testosterone to normal (pre-menopausal) levels.
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In addition, some therapies involving testosterone pills or skin fillings specifically designed to treat frigidity are currently being studied in hopes of gaining FDA approval in the near future. Preliminary studies have shown that fillings significantly increase sexual desire and satisfaction compared with placebo among postmenopausal women who have their ovaries removed.
The third phase of a testosterone patch clinical trial involving several thousand women worldwide. It currently closed and the results published soon. For the first time, this study looks at the effects of testosterone patches on natural menopausal women and those who have undergone surgery or early menopause caused by chemotherapy or removal of their ovaries.
Medications must be tested against placebo (sugar pills) where there are high expectations from the user. This will help measure the effectiveness of scientifically. This also helps explain why many supplements claim to be effective in treating frigidity such as low sexual desire. Because hope plays a large role in sexual desire, products that are sold freely can claim that they are effective, but the possibility is only a placebo effect.
However, in recent years, the introduction of anti-impotence treatments have encouraged more research to delve deeper into the causes of frigidity among women. Recent medical advances have resulted in more effective treatments and therapies that are beneficial to restore lust into the lives of more men and women.