Save Your Marriage- Before It’s Too Late

Save Your Marriage- Before It’s Too Late


Say “I Do” to Understanding Prenuptial Agreements

What is marriage? A different school of thoughts called it in different names: it has been called a blessing, a curse, an institution, and a ‘ball and chain.’ It’s known as the ‘final happiness’ and ‘the 10th circle of Hell.’ Sonnets, odes, songs, and mountains of books have been written about marriage.


Table of Content

1. Introduction

2. Say “I Do” to Understanding Prenuptial Agreements

3. The Eyes of the Beholder

4. What Is A Prenuptial Agreement (Pre-Marital Agreement)?

5. Who Should Consider A Prenup

6. What Should Be In a Pre-Nup

7. What Is Its Legal Validity

8. Important of Communication In Marriage!

9. Save Your Marriage Before It’s Too Late



Relationship advice columnist Ann Landers some time ago wrote, “Every marriage is blissful. It’s the living together after that that’s the challenge.”

Ann is right. No matter what else marriage may be, it’s a gamble. It’s also a contract. So it has become more and more common for people to enter into the union of marriage with the caution formerly reserved for big business mergers.


The Eyes of the Beholder 
From a religious perception, marriage is a “holy union.” From the state’s standpoint, marriage is an intentional private agreement between a man and a woman to become husband and wife. And in the eyes of the legal system, marriage is a binding contract with specific obligations under the law. And one day, that contract may need to be dissolved.


Marriage is an emotional and physical union, but it’s also a financial union. A prenuptial contract looks beyond the present joy of two people in love. Rather than ‘catch up in the moment,’ a prenuptial makes provisions for life’s unforeseen twists and turns. It’s an imperative ‘insurance policy’ that protects both parties from unforeseeable circumstances.

If you have something that important to you, it should be protected by a prenup.



What Is A Prenuptial Agreement (Pre-Marital Agreement)? 
Essentially, a prenuptial agreement is a legal document – an agreement between the bride and groom – made before they wed. As a general rule, it details what will happen to each person and collective incomes and assets if a death, divorce, or separation occurs.


Who Should Consider A Prenup 
A prenup is not a ‘test’ of love. It must not be seen as ‘the easy way out’ for individuals who aren’t sure their marriage will last. Therefore, a prenup ought to look upon as a protection, a safe place to fall just in case you do.


Famous person and millionaires wouldn’t think of marrying without advice from their lawyers and a safety-ensuring prenup. What about you? A prenup may be necessary for you if you…


* Possess valuable assets such as a house, stock, land etc 
* Own a business or a shareholder in one 
* May receive or have a large inheritance 
* Own children from a previous marriage 
* Have aged parents or loved ones who need financial help from you


You may be surprised to discover that a prenup can protect your present assets and your future earnings. You should also strongly think about a prenup

* If one of you is much better off than the other 
* Also if one of you will be supporting the other through college 
*  If you are pursuing a potentially lucrative profession such as medicine 
* Finally if you expect a dramatic increase in income because of professional success.



What Should Be In a Pre-Nup 
All prenups incorporate certain normal information. These comprise the names of the individuals, the date of marriage, reason for the agreement, and a list of children from previous relationships.


In addition to this, it details the terms of the agreement. In other words, it specifies the obligations of each party. The terms generally fall under major headings such as

Property division 
Support obligations 
Household expenses 
Matrimonial home 
Business interests 
Other property 
Tax consequences 
Estate planning


What Is Its Legal Validity 
Until recently, it was common for a prenuptial contract to be upturned by the courts. Many were struck down for their irrational terms or gross inequality. But in a landmark case decided in March 2004, the Supreme Court of Canada upheld a duly executed marriage contract, in spite of the fact that the terms were unfair.


The court affirmed that while the terms of might questionable, the drafting of the contract had met the legal requirements for a valid contract. This is a strong indicator that the courts are reluctant to meddle in a voluntary agreement made by two well-educated adults with legal representation.

In spite of the move towards upholding prenups, however, there remain impeccable reasons why a prenup may be nullified.


As a contract, a prenup may be canceled for the same grounds as any contract. This is to say that it was entered into under duress, because of undue influence, fraud, unconscionability, fundamental breach, by mistake, and so on.


Grounds for invalidation also include failure by a spouse to disclose fully his/her assets and debts at the time of signing. And finally, the agreement may also be thrown out if one spouse did not understand fully the nature and consequences of the prenup.


Important of Communication In Marriage!

When people in a relationship are told that they need to communicate more they always think that is an open invitation to discuss but there is a total difference between discussion and communicating.

save your marriage

Communicating is an art and art of combining the capability to express your views and feelings in such a way as to make sure that the individual or people you are talking to aware of what you are trying to say with the ability to pay attention and comprehend another person’s point of view.


I have sat quite a number of times in a room in meetings and at conferences, and I have just watched and listened to what is going on around me. It is totally interesting when entire groups of people have no aptitude to listen to their age group, colleagues or friends and so cannot comprehend or understand any opinion other than their own.


What is suppose to say in ten minutes or learn in half an hour always takes hours or days simply because people refuse to sit back, listen and understand?


For several years it’s surprising the number of times people are given information that, if they acted upon, could perfectly alter a relationship, career or the success of a business. But, due to the sheer lack of people’s aptitude to listen to and think through another person’s point of view good opportunities pass them over.


Relationships are no different from the work environment other than there are, typically, just both of you. Often, what could be a marriage made in heaven is shattered by the sheer incapability to communicate. The most successful relationships, be it personal or business is those whereby both parties have communication and listening skills.


Most relationship problems start with poor communication. Couples mostly feel that their partner ought to know what they are thinking, and how they feel so do not communicate and then wonder why they are not taking care.


How many couples decide not to tell their spouse something simply because they don’t know how to talk about it and then the problem just eats away at the relationship until there is no relationship left? What a disaster, just the total ability to share a problem can become an insurmountable issue a tiny little jinx on a large horizon.


So any time you feel stressed or don’t know what to do don’t just bottle it up, say it out, seek elder advice and listen to the answer. Don’t keep quiet when you know that you have a problem that is bothering you. Don’t postpone until tomorrow what has to be sorted today. Tomorrow never comes!!


It is the way you say something that will destroy your relationship and not what you ought to say. The incorrect way is just to let slip something that you know will worsen or grief your partner. The last thing you want is for them to get defensive, storm off or explode into floods of tears. You want someone you are trying to communicate with to respond and perceptive and in order to be able to accomplish this, your timing and approach have to be right.


Every person is different what will work with one person may not necessarily work with another and with some people all you can do is sew the seed and then let them go and work it.


I know someone who has never listened to anyone. She is one of the people who is always right regardless of what happens. She has no hint about being a team player and operates within a zero-tolerance zone. Conservative approaches and method of reasoning just don’t work and all you can do is plant the seed of thought which ultimately develops into her, own satisfactory idea.


Given peoples independence, you need to learn what is the right approach for you and your spouse. Ensure that you didn’t start a discussion if you don’t have time to finish it, don’t insist on the discussion when one of you is off out to work, dealing with the children or just relaxing in front of their favorite TV programme.


If the timing appears to never right ask your partner when would it be a good time for us to just sit down and talk?. No matter what you do, do not let yourself seem restless either in what you say or how you say it. Body language can just as easily put your spouse on the defensive as what you say to them. Even if your spouse is vying for a fight just don’t react. Remember the first golden rule, approaching defensive with defensive is a sure way to failure.


One of the best ways to improve communication is to build up strong listening skills. Couples usually fail to listen to what their other half has to say, cut in and give the impression that no matter what is said they won’t change their mind. One trick to make certain that you have listened and you do comprehend is to repeat what you have heard. This will show that you are paying attention to what was said and by repeating it back you have the chance to understand and comprehend.


How often do we try and work through a problem and its only at the point we are explaining the problem to somebody else does the magic light bulb switch on which allows us to come up with the answer. If you are writing an exam would you be expecting to know everything just by being told it once? For most people, I would say no. We should work on it.


No one has ever promised that marriage would be easy. It’s just another lesson we have to learn as we go through life but if you want to keep your marriage and make it even more unique than it was before then there is nothing to stop you if you really determined.


Relationship problems can lay heavy on your mind, become a weight and what was originally a small problem can expand into an insurmountable mountain.


If you start to feel that nuptial issues are starting to weigh heavily on your mind, take a break and do something you take pleasure in and if possible with your partner. If you can change your attention to the better things in life everyday issues always seem that much smaller. Spending a little time together and enjoy each other’s company can make you and your spouse bring back some of the feelings that have been lost through day-to-day argument and help you regain a positive outlook on your relationship.


Just one last word of advice, when you are not happy and feel you no longer want to keep your marriage don’t forget that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. If you think you have financial problems now what do you feel it will be like when you divide your assets. If you think you don’t have time to do things what will it be like when you are on your own or worse a single parent?


Recommended: Maiden Name-Best Way to Change It After Marriage


And if you are feeling alone now how will you feel every time you walk in your front door all you have is your own company. Now, none of these thoughts have been aired to persuade you to stay in a bad relationship but rather to make you consider whether or not yours is as bad as you think.

You are the master of your own destiny and if you decide to twist a bad marriage around you have the capacity at your fingertips.

How to Save Your Marriage Before It Is Too Late

Everyone wants to have a happy marriage. A happy marriage is one of the best things life can give. But after some time different types of issues appear in our life. Of course, most people give up on marriage too soon, and a lot of marriages end up due to unsettled difficulties.


What happens if nothing of those things from the start of your relationship is happening any longer such as the little favors at the present time, cook your best meal, buy you something special; those little things that demonstrated she cares about you. We know that losing the person we love is hard on anyone.


Like many people in your situation, you are possibly feeling fearful and baffle, without knowing what to do next. If you believe that your marriage in a crisis, don’t show your spouse that you’re freighting; try to keep calm and in control your emotion.


You should both remember that no matter how bleak things seem, it is achievable for many marriages to get back on track, but both husband and wife should prepare to cooperate in order to save the marriage. The most important thing is to stay calm and to know what to stay away from and what to do to make the relationship work.


You can save your marriage even though your spouse wants a separation, she asks for a divorce, or doesn’t love you any longer. But to end divorce you need to stop doing what hurts your relationship, knowing that there’s always an expectation to save your marriage.


Jealousy is one of the reasons why many people get a divorce but are not the only one. If she caught you with infidelity and that’s why she wants to get divorced, the hardest thing you ought to do is to re-establish trust in your relationship: always be on time home, do what you say you do and be sincere so as to save your marriage.


Also, don’t lie to your partner again, communicate clearly all the time, take time to assure your partner if she unsure of herself, show her love on regular basis and also be patient with her. As I said there are many other reasons why people get divorced. This is generally a big mistake so try first to do all the sacrifices in order to save your marriage.


1. The most important is to identify your problems; take a frankly look at the relationship and decide what the problems are; accurately express what is worrying you, as much details as possible; look for way outs rather than blaming your spouse. This tip will help you save your marriage. 


2. If you are responsible for this situation, show her your companion, respect and affection; remind her on a daily basis how much you love her and put meaning from the heart into those words. 


3. To save your marriage, start doing things you regularly do when both were still loved and married.


4. Express your thoughts, communicate your feelings sincerely and honestly as you can, this will help you to save your marriage. 


5. To really save your marriage, you ought to establish open discussion and start to compromise and heal; talk about your emotion and come to an agreement about what you think the relationship needs.


6. Also, you ought to develop listening skills as well; the things which bring up need to treat as guides so that the husband and wife will know how to respect each other’s feelings and points of view; she can talk about what she is feeling concerning the relationship. 


7. You should work hard to appreciate and change what is worrying your partner in the relationship; even though she still loves you, she may see some unrelenting problems in you, and that’s the reason she may have lost hope for the relationship because of them; you should understand better your partner’s view of these problems


8. If you are getting old on your sex life, discuss it together, both of you should spend more time together alone, go on a vacation. This will help you save your marriage. 


9. Remember that any issue can be understood and interpreted in different ways, otherwise, you will stay in a rut forever.


10. Remember that to really save your marriage, you ought to think regarding the ways you participate in the situation.


11. Learn to internalize and know that your other half is not you; you should both find ways to identify with the other’s point of view


12. Appreciate the worth of the other’s experience in the way that is different from yours.


13. Don’t give room for old negative behavior patterns to marsh the present moment.


14. Know how to forgive and forget; learn to overlook anything and accept each other; bringing up the past will not save the marriage; one should learn to forgive the partner and overlook all the mistakes from the past.


15. You should both seek a solution to the problem; keep in mind that you are two different people; is not about who is winning here, it’s about respect, intimacy, growth, and emergence.


16. Make a plan to work as a couple, such as: to communicate without arguing, to try to do things as husband and wife, to find a solution to your problems, and also jot down your feelings and let the other read them.


17. Last but not the least, be tolerant; your matrimonial problems did not crop up overnight and they will not solve overnight; talk about all the emotions that you both undergo until you will center and set to begin anew.


Recommended: The Basic Secrets of A Successful Marriage


So, if you have some issues in your marriage, wait first to see if that marriage can be saved.  Be optimism that there is a hope to save your marriage regardless of how many problems appear in your life. And don’t forget that to have lasting satisfaction you must know how to keep love and good feelings alive.

3B Olusegun Oluseye street, Lagos, Nigeria
Ayodele Taiwo is a graduate of the University of Ado Ekiti( now Ekiti State University) Nigeria. He holds a bachelor's degree in Business Administration and Management.If you are searching for a reputable and professional writer with a proven track record to produce high quality and exceptional articles for your blog. Contact me to discuss your need now!I am also available for your proofreading, Article writing, Editing, Copywriting, Web content writing, Guest posting, Ghostwriting, Article re-writing, etc.

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